Mike,
I had problems with that connector also, but it's been years since I took it apart to replace the fan. Push it all the way to one side or the other and pull the connector apart ( I forget which) but you also have to lift the small tab at the bottom of the connector while your pulling the two halves apart.
Your problem is most certainly the fan motor. Hundreds of us have had to replace it. It's not too bad. It comes out from the top after taking off the holding bolts on both sides. The worst part is taking the front brace off because the radiator has to tilt forward to give you enough clearance to lift the fan housing out.
