INDICATORS 
THAT YOUR EMPLOYER HAS CHANGED TO
A CHEAPER HMO...
1) Your annual breast exam is done at Hooter's.
2) Directions to your Doctor's office include "Take a left when
entering the trailer park."
3) The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles.
4) The only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter.
5) The only item listed under Preventative Care coverage is "An
apple a day."
6) Your primary care physician is wearing the pants you gave to
Goodwill.
7) "The patient is responsible for 200% of out of net charges" is
not a typographical error.
8) The only expense covered 100% is "embalming."
9) With your new HMO, your Prozac come in different colors with
Little "M"s on them.
AND THE NUMBER ONE SIGN YOU'VE JOINED A VERY CHEAP HMO:
10) You ask for Viagra, and they give you a Popsicle stick and Duct
tape.
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