You must be a liberal if.....

[thegoldpt]

If you think Rob Reiner had to stretch to play the liberal in "All in the Family"

If you think the answer to ANY crime, infraction, or injustice is counseling.

If you've spent no less than 30 years in the walls of academia and don't see how today could be too much different from the '60s.

If you think the criminal has more rights than the police who arrest this criminal, unless the crime is sexual harassment, or racism.

If you use the term 'open-minded' and don't care that it can't be defined in absolute terms.

If you think only white people can be racist.

If Clarence Thomas made you sick, Bob Packwood made you protest, but Bill Clinton is a victim of partisan politics.

If you think that teenager's sexual behavior is uncontrollable, but hardened violent criminals should be released on parole after serving a cut sentence in a "correctional institution".

If you think Maxine Waters and Sheila Jackson Lee are articulate geniuses but Justice Clarence Thomas, Dr. Alan Keyes and Dr. Walter Williams are dolts.

If you think Rush Limbaugh and Michael Reagan are mean spirited racists and promote hate crime but Maxine Waters, John Conyers and Louis Farakahn aren't and don't.

If you think that the Constitution is a living document and should be changed but the writings of Karl Marx are "written in stone".

If you think burning the United States flag should be Constitutionally protected but burning a cross should be outlawed.

If you think that tax cuts hurt poor people and are uncompassionate but taking 30% from their paychecks is compassionate

If your idea of hell is having to mind your own business and not meddle in other people's lives.

If you believe that posting the "Ten Commandments" in schools will hurt the children, but putting "Heather Has Two Mommies" or "Ask Alice" (on the internet) won't.

If you think that the American Dream could have only been accomplished in the '60s.

if you think that conservatives have no sense of humor then shudder at the idea of a Clinton joke.

If you actually do believe that Clinton doesn't know the definition of the words "alone", "is", or "correct".

If you believe that Columbus is a mean-spirit bringer of genocide, and never should have explored to the new world, which meant that no one would have religious or taxation freedom whatsoever.

If you think that the only way the tragedy in Littleton, CO could have been avoided was to restrict the access of the guns, two of which were bought on the black market.

If you actually think the multicultural movement of the '90s works better than organized religion.

If you don't want the Christian Right imposing their morality on you, but you want to impose big government on everyone else because they won't do the right thing.

You're a liberal if you can't see the irony in your own beliefs.

If you believe Peter Jennings is a very educated and intelligent man.

If you can actually believe everyone around Bill Clinton is lying, but Bill Clinton himself is telling the truth.

If you point to God's forgiveness of King David in reference to Bill Clinton but "forget" to read the rest of the scripture about the ruin that he inflicted on his family, his kingdom and himself.

If you think that the only acceptable hate crime is Christian bashing.

If you want to make the rich "pay their fair share" but leave Ted (more people have been killed in my car than in an American nuclear power plant) Kennedy and Dick Gebhardt out of the definition of the rich.

If your idea of compassion is giving a homeless person a shopping cart but expecting them to accept the responsibilities of life is mean spirited, racist, bigoted, etc. ad nauseum.

If you think Princess Diana was compassionate for hugging poor children and children with AIDS (while "forgetting" about her getting in her limo and driving away) but Mother Teresa makes you uncomfortable.

If you think that "dumbing down" America's school kids is compassionate but holding them to high educational standards is "mean

[satellite66]

Good list. Here is another one.
You must be a liberal if you don't think that is a good list.

[SuGamer]

Good list, but I disagree on one issue. While we are here today because of Columbus, it doesn't change the fact of who he was. He personally over saw the murder of the men and boys, and the rape of the women and girls of the natives on the island of Hispaniola, which you now know as Haiti and the Dominican Republic. Explorer, yes, adventurer, yes, father of the new world and what it has become, yes, man with a good heart, no. Native Americans hate Columbus. Are they Liberials? NO! They are realistic. The man was ultimately reponsible for them having their land stolen from them along with most of their culture and pride and many ancestors. So just because Columbus built the foundations of what became a great country today, doesn't mean he was an angel.

[nehope]

quote:Originally posted by SuGamer

Good list, but I disagree on one issue. While we are here today because of Columbus, it doesn't change the fact of who he was. He personally over saw the murder of the men and boys, and the rape of the women and girls of the natives on the island of Hispaniola, which you now know as Haiti and the Dominican Republic. Explorer, yes, adventurer, yes, father of the new world and what it has become, yes, man with a good heart, no. Native Americans hate Columbus. Are they Liberials? NO! They are realistic. The man was ultimately reponsible for them having their land stolen from them along with most of their culture and pride and many ancestors. So just because Columbus built the foundations of what became a great country today, doesn't mean he was an angel.

Jesus Christ, the point was to lighten this up!

[Retro]

This is supposed to be what is called a "satirical joke"! Lighten up![^]

[satellite66]

Somebody needs to switch to decafe ASAP.

[thegoldpt]

Counter arguments anywone?

[Johns Steel Blue]

I really think it is time to close all of these "Political Threads". Things are getting out of hand.

[FloweryBranchCruiser]

Reminds me of a Ziggy from several years ago (updated to be for this year)...

513 years ago, Christopher Columbus discovered America. Of course, the Indians were already here. But that didn't stop good ol' Chris. He went ahead and discovered them too!

[thegoldpt]

quote:Originally posted by Johns Steel Blue

I really think it is time to close all of these "Political Threads". Things are getting out of hand.

I agree, i made a political debate forum just after i posted this, so i am hoping people will take their arguments over there....