Guy Rules

[CREWZIN]

The Guys' Rules

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down


We always hear "the rules"
from the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note... these are all numbered "1"
ON PURPOSE!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing

of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving

it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.
See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void

after 7 days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls,
don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways
and one of the ways makes you sad or angry,
we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something
or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have

to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and

neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also

a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing,"
we will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the

hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to,
expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are
prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh!!

[KingKole02]

CREWZIN,
Hate to crimp your wires but I think this has already been posted.
http://ptcruiserlinks.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=7110

[bigdogdad]

Be kind now, after all Crewzin's over 35[][)]

[CREWZIN]

Hey, Gary just posted it yesterday....guess that's what I get for not readin ALL the posts. [:I]

[Gary04GT]

That's okay, CREWZIN--we know you have been very busy enjoying all the sun and surf down in Florida... [^] [8D]

[bigdogdad]

Gee Gary, I wish I was there. Retirement I mean[:I]

[gonzomania]

Well I didn't see it before and laughed like hell. Had to print it for the wife ----is she laughing ?????? Couch isn't that bad you can snore as loud as you want

[CREWZIN]

quote:Originally posted by Gary04GT

That's okay, CREWZIN--we know you have been very busy enjoying all the sun and surf down in Florida...[img]

OH YEA!

[KingKole02]

I think crewzin is still thinking about that last show.

[CREWZIN]

OH YEA, YEA, YEA